Because I can...

I am writing a blog. Because I am smart and am able to write a blog :)

There once was a year...

...called 2010. I lived through this year. It just happened to be the year that just passed. I now feel like writing some massive note about it. Because I can. So I can, and will. Therefore, I'm writing this right now. So ner :P

So. 2010. Who liked it? Yes? No? I can tell you... I didn't mind it. It was random. I've made some new friends, lost some old ones, am probably now hated by more people then ever, but I'm pretty sure I've got some good friends too. Hopefully...

Honestly. I don't know why I'm writing this. I think it was largely prompted by the fact that it was my last day at Wonthaggi today. For the second time.

Go figure.

My traineeship came to an unofficial end today. It was my last day with the kids at the school, and probably the last time I'll see most of them. It's a weird feeling really... I've put so much effort into helping some students this year, and I'm going to see nothing for it. It's kinda disorienting. That, and the fact that I'm finishing high school. I'm leaving WSC. For the second time. In 2 years. How many people can say they've done that? That alone is a weird feeling. Let's just say I'm feeling a bit weird at the moment. And I'm annoyed that I've met some awesome people through that traineeship... and now I have no clue whether I'll see any of them ever again.

Besides that. That other side of my live, the youth side, it's been quite awesome this year. I've been so busy outside of school. Youth, Junior Youth, Small group, Somers, CYC... ect ect. You get the drift. Edge youth this year. It has grown, amazingly. To see it become what it has, and to help be a part of that growth, it's been one of the most rewarding and enjoyable experiences of my life. Everyone who has been involved in it over the past couple of years, I just want you to know that you've all been an inspiration to me, and without you I wouldn't be who I am today. You know who you are, and I thank you for everything you've done.

Unexpected thank you's... I like where this is going. Anyway, besides the awesomeness of Edge youth this year, some of you may know that I've been quite heavily involved in at Cranbourne Uniting Church this year, with their youth stuff too. Being there this year has been awesome, and in doing so I've made some awesome friends, and become really close to people I've known for years. Being there this year has been amazing... and I want it to continue. I love that place, I really do.

Anyway... we're done with the youth side of things. Almost. There's just a couple of small things I'm yet to mention. One of those small things is a nice little organisation which runs awesome camps. It goes by the name of CYC, and is responsible for one of the awesomest camps ever, called Impact. As of spring this year, I came to the realisation that I'd been leading at Impact for 2 years now. Those 2 years have gone quick. But, in those 2 years, I've lead on 8 camps there, soon to be 9 this summer, and I have to say, it's a lifechanging place. I've met some amazing  people there, and the amount of personal growth I've achieved through Impact is unbelievable. Seeing some of the kids who have gone there for the time I've been there, seeing them grow over those two years. It's so rewarding to see.

And then there's Somers. Need I say more?

The one place that has truly influenced my life more than any other. It's guided me to who I am today, it's probably the reason why I'm doing everything I do with my life. Leading there this year, it challenged me. I stepped up to roles I haven't touched before, I pushed myself. And I felt like I succeeded. This year was one of my favourite years so far, and personally, the most rewarding year yet. I look forward to seeing what happens in the future.

So yeah, that's basically what I've been up to this year. Kinda. There's also that small matter of sport. Being able to play basketball again this year was like, awesome, despite the fact that the stupid Cowes basketball courts absolutely killed my shins.  I love the sport though. Volleyball, on the other hand... to think I nearly didn't play this season. I've come from a dodgy B-Grade player this year, to someone who can kinda play a half decent game. I've come to love the sport, and it's been pretty important to me. I wanna keep playing. So yeah, hopefully I can :)

And that should be the end of these ramblings. Please, feel free to comment, complain, criticise, or ignore completely. I don't mind.

Well, I do. I'd like comments.
But hey, as if most of you are going to post any. 

Either way. Goodnight, and goodbye.

So over it...

So... I'm about 95% sure I'm about to give up all hopes of ever succeeding with anyone from the female race. Any thoughts people?

Searching...

Sometimes... it feels like I'm just pointlessly searching.
Looking for what I want.
And all I find is nothing.

The cuteness...

As I write this, I'm lying on the couch at my friends house.
On my laptop.
Doing nothing
...and procrastinating about going to sleep.

We all do it.

But, you see, I'm the only one in the house.
Well, me, my friend, and his girlfriend.
And they are both currently in his room, with the door open, and they're speaking very loudly...
Meaning I have no choice but to listen to everything they say.

I have to say... the cuteness of it all makes me want to chuck.
They get along so well, and it's all so lovey dovey.
In saying that, I'm not angry. I'm not annoyed...
...well, I kinda am.

Why am I annoyed?
Is it because they're keeping me awake?
Is it because I've been ignored completely?
Is it because they started talking about peeing?

No.

It's purely because I'm so completely and utterly jealous.
Being exposed to something you want so much for 3 days straight...
and then hearing it go on for an hour straight...
It gets to me.
Being so over singleness... wanting to find someone so much.
And failing at it all the time. It annoys me.


I just want to find that one person...

It's crushing down...

Why do I feel like I'm under so much pressure?
No matter what I do, I just feel like I'm about to crack.
I'm over it. I'm over what I do, and I just want it to change.
Constantly feeling tired, frustrated, angry...
And for no reason at all.

I'm not used to wanting to hit something,
wanting to break the closest thing to me.
I don't know why I feel like this, but I want it to end.
It's not who I am, it's not who I want to be...
But it's who I'm becoming.

I want it to stop.

Just to fill this up more...

I feel like writing stuff. So here it goes...

Once upon a time, there was a little fairy.
It was pink, and had pretty little wings.
It also glowed, and it glowed a bright blue.

This little fairy was the only bright thing in a dark, dark world.
There was little light.
No one was happy.
And all the trees had no leaves.

The bright pink fairy decided one day, to make everything happy and colourful again.
So, one by one, it went around to all the people in the world.
It showed them colour.
Showed them light.
And made them happy again.
Until, one by one, it had gone around to all the people in the world.

Doing this made the fairy very happy.
It also started to bring colour and light into the world again.
No longer was the fairy the only thing that glowed in the world.
Trees started growing leaves.
The sun started to shine.
And people started smiling.

Over time, the world became a happy place again.
There was colour everywhere.
There was always life, and light.
It was a wonderful place to live.
And it was all because the little fairy showed others kindness.

The end :)